Her Off Button  

Posted by H in ,

A question girls always get in this job is whether they enjoy it having sex with their clients.

While looking around I had all different kinds of answers.

Some swear bloody Hell that, of course, they have pleasure with their clients and more often that not. And it's normal. Others will just say they enjoy the act without really reaching orgasm, mostly because of their lack of interest, though it can happen. Another third group will say they just shut off and don't enjoy and that their body won't even do the rest, they don't enjoy neither mentally nor physically.

For G., though she says she sometimes has great sex with clients, she says she has a hard time to get into it.

She prefers jobs where she has to do girls, as a personal preference (I am apparently sort of an exception on her personal road map. Good for me). But if it's a guy, he has to be attractive otherwise she has a hard time getting get turned on, and that's a problem because it doesn't help. Looks are really important for her. If he's attractive, it's much easier.

On the other hand, if it's a girl going down on her, she has a very hard time, though she prefers girls. Exactly because of this: she prefers them and don't want them in this context. She told me actually feeling sorry a few times for girls getting at her for 10 minutes without her starting to show any hint of getting wet, though they wanted to please her. And she actually likes to do girls, but prefers to be done by guys.

Guess it depends on everyone's tastes in that matter.

I have no idea if this is normal. That she sometimes has a hard time to get turned onm I mean. I agree with some posts and comments I've read, stating that ultimately, you can turn anyone on, as long as you take the time and put some attention and effort into it. But the mood can make it pretty hard.

But she's not always been like that. Apparently the problem is related to me. She's been doing this job for a while, but never on a really intensive *and* long-lasting basis. She's doing it on and off, either occasionally when she needs money, or intensively for a few months to spare some cash and then completely stop working for a while and focus on other aspects of her life.

And usually she would go back to this business when she's not involved with someone anymore. Apparently I had her lose quite a lot of money. Well, "lose" is a big word: she missed a lot of jobs because of me, that's what it is. Some I know of, from before she told me but when I had figured it out, or after her confession and she would tell me she just didn't want to go. And apparently some other ones.

And she wouldn't do this usually, and tell her partners to stay out of it (if they knew), and to not get too involved. Which sounds good for me again, if the pattern is different here (I know, skeptics around here will tell me again that I have to get off my high horse, that she's just saying this to be nice).

The thing is, she can't do this while she's dating someone. It's too hard on her. She's too emotional for her, and though she can do the job really intensively if she needs to when she's single, and just shut off her brain and pretend, or enjoy but without really caring, she can't do it when she's involved.

She can't switch off. She gets too confused emotionally, somewhere in-between her jobs and her relationship.

That's why she cut it down a little lately, and accepts only the nice jobs, and tries to accommodate to my timetable.

I think it's terrific in a way, because I like the way we're going, and I appreciate the gesture. On the other hand, I just hope I'm not changing her life too much, that she's not getting too confused, that I'm not having her change too much for me, that she doesn't miss out for me (high horses chorus in the background. But though I acknowledge the singers might be right, may I also just point out there is a possibility they feel a little jealous and/or bitter because they'd like to have the same thing, but so far it never worked out, or it did and crashed ? Maybe like it will for us.)

Or maybe that's just her normal evolution and she reached a point where she wants to take it slower.


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